Coming Back Stronger
It’s been a long time since I’ve posted, and honestly, I wasn’t sure if I ever would again. But after everything I’ve been through, I know one thing for sure, I’m not the same person who started this blog two years ago.
This past year has been hard, yes. But the truth is, the last decade nearly broke me.
For 10 years, I lived in an emotionally and verbally abusive marriage, (never physical) the kind that slowly grinds you down until you don’t even recognize yourself anymore. The kind where conversations about PTSD and the loss of joy aren’t theoretical, they’re real, lived experiences.
And for six of those years, I drank to survive it. I thought alcohol was my escape, my way to numb out the pain, but all it did was pour gasoline on the fire.
No DUIs or medical issues to report, but everything else you hear about people with drinking problems was true for me: lying about how much I drank, hiding bottles, planning ahead to never be without alcohol, and avoiding evening plans so my drinking wouldn’t be interrupted.
Nursing hangovers and enduring the mental and physical anguish of being hungover daily—along with the regret and countless “day ones” trying to get sober.
I promised myself and swore to heaven thousands of time to end this nightmare. And if I am being honest, I eventually only started to see one way out, and that was a layer of pain so hard to explain.
It was hell. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
But somehow, I fought my way out. – There was a push (addressing my marriage) that I will get more to later!
I’ve spent thousands of hours digging myself out of the hole, reading, learning, listening to podcasts and audiobooks, going to therapy, working with a coach, breaking old patterns, studying Stoicism, leaning on unexpected support systems, and sitting in the challenges of my choices, and slowly, piece by piece, rebuilding my life.
And now, I’m here. Sober (mostly). Healing. Learning who the hell I actually am.
A year and a half later, after facing all the issues, spending months and months totally alcohol free, I am now free to enjoy a drink now and then with absolutely no need or desire to overdo it. In fact, the idea of being buzzed or, God forbid, drunk is pretty inconceivable to me today. But honesty is important. I now do enjoy a drink, at most two, but more often than not, I just prefer to skip it altogether.
So that’s what this blog is about now.
If you’re trying to get sober, take control of your drinking, escape a relationship that’s destroying you, or just stop feeling like you’re barely surviving, I get it. I know what it’s like to feel trapped, to think there’s no way out.
And I know this isn’t something most men talk about.
It’s not easy for guys to admit their spouse or girlfriend is abusive. But I’m here to tell you: it’s a real problem. It’s under-discussed. And it’s time we bring it into the light.
Because there is a way out.
I don’t have all the answers. But I can tell you what I’ve learned. And I can tell you that no matter how deep in it you feel right now, you’re not alone.
I’m here to share my story, not for pity but to bring hope to other men who feel stuck in the dark.
Remember! It’s up to us, no one else. https://oneguysstory.com/2023/05/18/no-one-is-coming-to-help-you/#more-872
#emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #alcoholfree #sober #marriage #men #mentalhealth
Alcohol, Marriage, Personal Growth and More 
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