We all get our turn.

Why I’m Not Like Most People –
I don’t chase fake happiness or pretend life’s all good vibes and vision boards (which I have). I question everything, maybe even to a fault (even questioning my neurosurgeon!). Purpose, pain, the point of it all. I’ve been through hell in ways most people keep quiet about.

I track habits, results, dissect, and rebuild my life like it’s a system I refuse to let beat me. I’m not trying to be average, ignorant, or dishonest with myself. I just want better. Maybe more so, I refuse to be a victim in need of anyone’s help.

My mind’s wired to ask why this, why now, what’s next—not in panic, but in curiosity. I don’t avoid suffering. I expect it. It’s just my turn. Like celebration, love, loss, and death will be all of ours. We all take turns in this cycle, and we forget too easily what matters when it’s not our pain on the table. That’s the human weakness: short memory, low empathy.

I almost despise mindsets like, “if it’s meant to be”, or “don’t say negative things out loud, they may come true”. To me, these are mentally weak and deflect from both personal responsibility and the acceptance of life as simply unknown.

But I try not to forget. I’m here to live eyes wide open, uncomfortable or not. That’s what makes me different. Not better. Just different.

This is not about doom and gloom. Not at all. It’s about how perceive the reality all around us.