Alcohol, Marriage, Personal Growth and More
Refusing to Settle. Choosing Peace. Living Free.
Over the last few years, I’ve been moving through more major life stressors than I ever really pulled together into one view. From 2021 through late 2023, I was in a daily alcohol cycle—finishing a bottle of vodka every two days, my main goal every day was to pull my shit together enough to do... Continue Reading →
Has she never said, “I see how this hurts you, and I want to do better”? No. And this is why I can’t go back. This is why I knew, deep down, there was no remorse—or enough sympathy—to say it out loud to me and show vulnerability. In the face of overwhelming evidence, the inability... Continue Reading →
Today, an attorney filed a divorce petition, symbolizing years of emotional exhaustion. Despite moving out five months ago, memories of conflict linger. Subtle criticisms during interactions reaffirmed the need for separation. While empathy remains, the author recognizes that peace, freedom, and respect are unattainable in a relationship marked by constant invalidation.
Tonight I’m writing from a place I never expected to be again: the house I used to call home. I’m here temporarily while my wife is in Chicago visiting her family for Christmas week. I am helping with the dogs, sleeping in the same bed where I spent so many nights trying to convince myself... Continue Reading →
The journey to this point has been brutal.It’s worn me down in ways I never thought possible. Heck, in ways I never knew could be possible. And while I’m still standing, I’m not the same man I was. Not even close. This didn’t happen overnight.It happened slowly, over years—until one day I realized the version... Continue Reading →
For years, I’ve been caught in an emotional whirlwind, wrestling with a deeply personal decision:Do I keep fighting for a marriage that’s carved painful and permanent scars? Or do I finally summon the courage to step away and reclaim my life? Writing this isn’t just therapeutic—it’s my reminder, my accountability, and maybe a lifeline to... Continue Reading →
My therapist recently gave me an exercise to help clarify what truly matters to me—to reconnect with who I am at my core. After more than a decade of emotional and verbal abuse, I’ve been left rebuilding everything: my thoughts, my feelings, my sense of self. If you’ve never experienced this kind of abuse, that... Continue Reading →
For years, I didn’t realize I was being emotionally and verbally abused. There were no bruises, no screaming fights. Just constant tension, confusion, and the slow erosion of my sense of self. It was the perfect example of death by a 1000 cuts. Eye rolls, snapping of fingers, walking away, the criticism disguised as advice,... Continue Reading →
For a long time, I asked myself if I was just too sensitive. If I was overreacting. Maybe I was the problem. I questioned myself constantly. I doubted myself. I lied to myself, saying, “It’s not really that bad,” because that’s what years of emotional and verbal abuse can do. It doesn’t always leave bruises.... Continue Reading →
Alcohol, Marriage, Personal Growth and More 